Corrupt a Wish Game (v4)

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it's been sitting out all day. OH! And a balrog lives inside it. And you have to fight a million slymes from Dragon Quest to get to it. And the door behind you is closed, so you can't turn around, you must deal with the millions slymes. And the balrog. Good luck!

I wish my life was more like an awesome video game and I was in god-mode.

[kj3400 178]

Granted but you accidentally corrupt your save file and forgot to backup.

I wish I had long hair.

[Charlie_Zane 963]

Granted, but you are unable to cut it, ever.

I wish my PC could turn on again.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted. It sprouts arms and legs as it turns self-aware and begins hunting you and your loved ones down in a blood-filled rage for reasons that remain unclear even as he achieves his ultimate goal of galactic domination.

I wish I had copied that Soul Coughing CD from my friend a few years ago.

[Fatherted 129]

You have, but the transition between songs is invariably Justin Bieber and an unfortunate chiwauwa-chihwauwah-chiwowa-****!

I wish I had a penthouse.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but the penthouse is so high you can't get out.

I wish I had a good paying job.

[Charlie_Zane 963]

Granted, but you can never leave the workplace, ever.

I wish someone would clean my house.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it becomes theirs after they finish, leaving you homeless.

I wish for a Coke Zero.

[Mithrik 562]

Granted, you get a bottle of Coke, with Zero contents inside.

I wish to know where is Waldo.

[Fatherted 129]

Granted, but you find him in your bedroom at night.

I wish PSN would die.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it then becomes undead and stalks you for the rest of your days. Don't worry though, it's not going to kill you, just be really annoying.

I wish to know what the theme song is for "SkyFall."

[kj3400 178]

Granted, you find out, but at the cost of never being able to know another song ever again.

I wish I had a pair of indestructible earphones.

[Waterclaw 80]

Granted, but they are at a constant volume, nothing will change it.

I wish I had more time in a day...

(100 posts, wheee~)

[Josh6 873]

Granted. However, due to the complexity of the english language I think you mean Thyme. Your house becomes burried in it daily.

I wish for a horse named Steve

[Fatherted 129]

Granted, but its voice is Steven Merchant and it cannot be killed.

I wish I got better grades in school.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but the high expectations placed upon your newfound higher grades places too much pressure on you, so you turn to performance enhancers and HGH to keep up with them. This inevitably leads to your downfall, brought about by the mandatory testing done by the league to ensure that all students are using legitimate means to finish their homework and perform well on their tests, causing you to end up dropping out of community college after a semester and a half and taking a job at a junkyard. Since you enjoy working outside, it's not all bad though. The dog there likes you, too.

I wish I had enough money to buy the car I want.

[Mithrik 562]

Granted, but suddenly cars of the type you want get abducted by the aliens, that are trying to understand our primitive ways of transportation.

I wish for cake.

[simlink 1,098]

Granted but it's stale.

I wish for snow.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it's yellow. Ew.

I wish I had made more progress in my novel.

[Fatherted 129]

Granted, but someone else takes credit for it.

I wish I was a Zombie.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but then you are headshot in typical zombie killing fashion.

I wish I could win the lottery and get the 550 million dollars at stake.

[Charlie_Zane 963]

You win but you loose it all on a trip to Vegas.

I wish Xmas could hurry up.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it's over too soon, and now you're older and shorter of breath.

I wish I could quote smart-sounding academic quotes at will.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but no one will ever understand what you're saying when you do.

I wish I had a new, not raggedy mousepad.

[Fatherted 129]

Granted, but it's only for decoration.

I wish I owned a rabbit.

[Charlie_Zane 963]

Granted, but it starts making holes everywhere and eats everything.

I wish it wasn't as hot today.

[airman15 4,113]

Granted, but now it's an ice age

I wish I could defy gravity at will

[Fatherted 129]

Granted, but it has a habit of shorting out.

I wish I had matching socks.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but they're made of the souls of Carrot Top and Fran Drescher, and every step you take, they sing "This is the Song That Never Ends".

I wish I hadn't made a wish.

Edit: FIXED, and it even fits with the corruption. Go me!

[kj3400 178]

Once again, a black hole occurs, sucking us all into oblivion, because the corrupt-a-wish 4000 can't make heads or tails of no wish.

I wish this didn't keep happening.