Corrupt a Wish Game (v4)

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted. I don't know what you meant, so here's a muffin.

I wish I could post ponies more often here...

[emperordaniel 1,281]

Granted. All of your posts, everywhere, forever, are just pictures of ponies. But not the MLP kind.

I wish for a cake that isn't a lie.

[simlink 1,098]

Granted - but it is made out of electronic components.

I wish mint chocolate wasn't so hard to find...

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted. A parasprite ate it all.

I wish someone could help review something for me that isn't SC4-related.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but I fill the review with obscure references, profanities, obscenities, spelling errors, and end up reviewing the Detroit Tigers' 2011 season instead.

I wish the White Sox would join the Indians and Twins in the pile of suck at the bottom of the AL Central.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but you short out the wish granter, so all baseball teams suck equally now.

I wish for a big chocolate cake on my birthday.

  Edited September 1, 2012 by kj3400  

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted, for a short time only.

I wish I felt better.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted. You feel better. Relative to a person with chronic herpes and hangnails who can only eat tofu.

I wish I had a million US dollars.

[emperordaniel 1,281]

Granted, but the bank you're keeping the money in is robbed.

I wish the second season of The Legend of Korra would come out already.

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

If that bank is a member of the FDIC, you're money is still safe... But only to a certain amount.

And Granted, but I tell you the spoilers.

Can I corrupt a corruption instead? And yes, I'll wish for that.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but Xhibit beats you up for not using 'yo dawg I herd you like corruption'.

I wish I had a honey bun.

[emperordaniel 1,281]

Granted, but then someone else eats it.

I wish for the next person's wish to be corrupted.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but the universe caves in on itself from the resulting paradox, sucking all life with it into oblivion.

I wish I could decide which internet memes can continue being funny and which ones must fade into nothingness to be forgotten for all time.

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted. Now everyone trolls you.

I wish I had my new computer built.

[emperordaniel 1,281]

(Hey, look! The universe didn't cave in on itself! )

Granted, but it's the size of a pinhead.

I wish I had a device to carry really heavy shopping bags with.

[kj3400 178]

Granted but it gives you super wedgies when it's not holding groceries.

I wish I didn't have to get up to get water.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but now you're always wet.

I wish Air Force had beaten Michigan last weekend.

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted. Michigan's now a giant hole in the ground.

I wish I had put more lettuce on my sandwich.

[simlink 1,098]

Granted but it is wilted and slimy.

I wish cell phone plans weren't so expensive.

[emperordaniel 1,281]

Granted - now they're dirt cheap and the quality is so bad, they fragment as soon as you pick them up.

I wish for everyone at ST to have cake.

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but then I eat it all.

I wish that one good thing could come out of these corrupted wishes.

[simlink 1,098]

Granted, but that one good thing gets corrupted and turns into an evil monster.

I wish wishing for things was easier.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but then they lose all value and the market collapses and the after effects ripple outward like so many words that continue to appear and extend this ridiculous run-on sentence with nary a period nor a comma in sight and wait for it wait for it wait for it wait for it wait for it boom goes the dynamite.

I wish I was better at my job (but only a little better because I'm already pretty good at it).

[kj3400 178]

Granted, but everyone else gets a lot better, and the boss starts looking to drop you.

I wish my Skype would stop acting up.

[Schulmanator 5,813]

Granted! It will work perfectly but while you are asleep it will call those just-for-tv places and order a bunch of stuff you are stick paying for... now you get 1000 snuggies!

I wish I had a pizza right now!

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

Granted, but it's been sitting out all night.

I wish Led Zeppelin would go on tour and I could get tickets right up front.

[Mithrik 562]

Granted, but then the day of the concert in your city, a typhoon hits and it gets canceled, and since they have a tight schedule they won't postpone it.

I wish for a cookie.

[Ganaram Inukshuk 906]

Granted. It's the spyware kind of cookie.

I wish for a cookie, and I mean the baked kind.

[kj3400 178]

Granted. It's a real cookie. But I ate it.

I wish for absolutely nothing.

[simlink 1,098]

Granted, which means you have no computer or really much of anything anymore.

I wish for iced tea (the Nestea kind).