The Moose Factory (virtual Bar & Grill)

[The Terminator 0]

* walks back in

* starts can can dancing since he's already dressed as a girl.

 

OK OK im sorry

 

*waves a union jack

 

*sings god save the queen(the non- Sex Pistols one.)

 

but hey! Queen Elizabeth would make a better president than Bush!

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

Date: 8/15/2005 10:26:44 PM
Author: The Terminator

* walks back in

* starts can can dancing since he's already dressed as a girl.

OK OK im sorry

*waves a union jack

*sings god save the queen(the non- Sex Pistols one.)

but hey! Queen Elizabeth would make a better president than Bush!

quote>

Well, TT, we provisionally forgive you. You must square yourself with the chat crowd on your own.

We only fly union jacks when a British official is here. For the Queen, we fly the Royal Standard along with the Canadian Flag. I really hope you know the second verse of God Save the Queen. It starts out Oh Lord, our God, arise ...

The Queen would make a lousy president. On the other hand, it you guys want to come back into the fold, we can probably get you a neat Governor General and a Prime Minister and a multi-party system.

[Lyhoko Leaci 770]

*The megleeches are not satisfied and place a whoopie cusion on TT's seat before putting chewed gum in his hair.*

Data file on the megleech

Picture:
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/3144/megleech4sp.png width=398>

Number: 049

Name: Megleech

What it does: An improvement on the megeech, this one does everything the original did, and also likes to dress boys up like girls when it is with friends, and do many different pranks in offices, schools, and malls.

Power rating (out of 15): 10

Poison rating (out of 10): 0

Meanness (out of 10): 8

[Zelgadis 638]

Well, two weeks in Canada and I've begun to notice things...

1) Canada doesn't look anything like it does in South Park's Terrance and Phillip... except for Kraft Dinner.

2) Milk in bags???

3) Is it really necessary for a country of 30 million to have such convoluted postal codes?

4) Is that pounds? Grams? Liters? Gallons? I care not what system you use, just pick one and stick with it!

5) Is it just me, or are the bees more aggressive here?

6) No Krispy Kreme! And Tim Hortons is sewage.

7) I get the strong impression that a bacon grease container is not something I'm gonna find here.

Somebody issue a memo to all Canadians: Air conditioners no longer have CFC's. You may use them now.

9) Would somebody kindly rouse the Minister of Potholes, a.k.a. Mr. Rip Van Winkle?

10) And finally, the next time I ask what the Governor-General does, I'd like an answer, not a befuddled stare.

Those are my nits. Considering the insignificance of the nits I choose to pick, I am very happy to be here. How about the good stuff?

1) Lake Ontario. So pretty!

2) No more shocked gasps whenever the topic of homosexuality is brought up.

3) (related to #2) or spontaneous militancy. It's such a non-issue here.

4) Mac stores EVERYWHERE!

5) Finally, a place that recycles!

6) Church Street and Yonge Street!

7) Black squirrels. So cute!

Special thanks to the Bank of Montreal, the employees of which actually appeared to want my business.

9) The Oedipal CN Tower.

10) And most importantly of all, seeing my bf again.

Ah, just some observations.

ISF

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

@Leech10: Mean and cruel or cruel and unusual punishment. I take it that a meanness rating of 8 is 8/10. What a bunch of bad guys. Maybe some of the other guests at the Factory will help TT to clean up. I don't think he is into cross-dressing.

@ zelgadis: Welcome to Canada. Now you have to get out of T.O. into the countryside and see what we are really like away from the Big Smoke.

President's Choice White Cheddar Macaroni and Cheese is better than KD by about a thousand rows of Christmas Trees. Go find a Loblaw's or a Real Canadian Super Store. Milk in bags means you have to get a milk pitcher. Get two, so you can wash one and still have one available. The postal codes are geographic and take you right down to only a few houses, or in our case, to a specific superbox. Weights and measures are still bouncing after about 25 years (or more). People won't accept metric until the last Vet of the Korean War dies, and maybe not even then. Bees are not more aggressive, but they probably like your odor. Get used to Timmy's. KK went bust here. People are convinced about cholesterol in Canada, even though it is dietary junk science. If you need good coffee, there are lots of Starbucks, just find a Chapters or Indigo book store and there you are. Bacon grease is best kept in the fridge in an old coffee mug. Makes great scrambled eggs. We all know about air conditioning, but the current propaganda from the do nothing provincial government is to save power by cutting coolness. Uncool, and the power crisis has been around for decades. The guy to yell at about pot holes is David Miller, the Mayor of all the people. The GG is head of state, just like the Queen in Britain (the GG is the Queen's represenative in Canada). The GG-apparent is having a bad hair month due to the radicals in La Belle Province (Quebec, full of ding-a-lings). Since she is Haitian, she will be our first black head of state. The last one was a Canadian of Chinese extraction. She seems like a very interesting lady, and all that separatist and independence stuff is just B.S.

If you think Lake Ontario is nice, try the one two blocks from my house - Lake Huron (Georgian Bay). Much nicer. You can make a day trip up here and actually go swimming. The beach is 14Km. long. All white sand, and clean. We don't single out gays any more than any other group, which is to say we don't. Next year, go to the gay pride parade. Glad you like MAC's. Recycling in T.O. is more advanced than here. We don't separate wet and dry garbage. We have gray squirrels, too. The Bank of Montreal is Canada's first bank (1832). Watch out for them, they are just as rapacious as all the rest. If you can, join a Credit Union. Are you suggesting that the CN tower would like to have intercourse with the city? Good you are a couple again. Enjoy being a landed immigrant.

[HRH_King_Newb 0]

Hey, this looks like a great place!

Do you serve frappuccinos?  Any Iced coffees?

 

Martinis, shaken, not stirred? (sorry, just had to say that!)

 

BTW, I've got something interesting...

I've come to the realization that I was meant to be Canadian.  I'm an American, but ever since going to Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario in July I want SO BADLY to go back!  Especially to places like Toronto or Montreal (where the bad part of town had flower baskets when my dad went twenty-odd years ago).  Living in Canada just...speaks to me.  It seems great.  Of course, not every cloud has a silver lining (if living in Canada could be associated with a cloud), but overall I was...well, amazed at the experience.  It was more than just hearing people at the Scotiabank saying aboot or eh (sorry about that, now I'll have someone telling me most Canadians don't talk like that ).  It wasn't just having my sub made differently at Subway.  It wasn't just seeing all the logos of the American restaurants having the majestic maple leaf incorporated into them.  It wasn't just seeing the sports apparel store in the mall dominated by hockey, and Canadian at that (ahhh, heaven on Earth)  It was being in a totally new place, a new COUNTRY at that, and just being away from the news and newspapers and the American government for four sacred days.  I think I've fallen in love with Canada, and I can't wait to see her again.

[HRH_King_Newb 0]

Actually I've developed an obsession with Tim Hortons, I'm trying not to but if it continues it may get a bit unhealthy.

I went to subway in the mall in Sault Ste. Marie, not the Tim Hortons and not even the Pizza Pizza in the movie theater.  About a month after we went to Canada we got the information booklets my dad had requested several weeks BEFORE we even went there, and along with that we got a coupon for Pizza Pizza.  Just by reading the booklets it makes me think they were intended for citizens of Canada...

 

Finally I just got back from the Mall of America in Minneapolis Tuesday (satisfying, but tiring...), and bought a Maple Leafs hat while I was there.  I really wanted to get a Canucks hat, but all they had was a jersey for eighty bucks. 

 

So, sorry about all this gushing about Canada, but I just think it's a great country and I can't even picture organized crime or any crime whatsoever occurring in Canada on a daily basis.  I LOVE CANADA!!!!

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

@ HRH_King_Newb: My friend, if I were you, I wouldn't be co-opting a title that can only be conferred by the Queen. HRH means you are a member of the Royal Family. This, I seriously doubt.

But no matter, welcome to the Moose Factory. As you may have read in the previous 45 or so pages, Moose Factory is on an original Canadian reservation across the Moose River from Moosonee, which is about two spits and a holler from James Bay. So you really have come upon a Canadian venue.

Service in the Moose Factory virtual bar and grill is handled by the autosystem, which consists of an autochef and an autobar, along with various automated support. It works telepathically, so if you will definitely decide what you want, think hard about it, and it will arrive by teleporter with appropriate service.

Canada welcomes everyone, unless you have a criminal record or are a known terrorist. If you want to see the throes of immigration, take a look at the last few posts by Zelgadis in this thread. Zelgadis has just arrived in Toronto from Kentucky; just in time for the largest fair in the country, and should go to the Canadian National Exhibition which is playing just now on the lakeshore. Later on, for horsey types, there is the Royal Agricultural Winter Fair in the same place (Exhibition Park, Toronto) which comes complete with the Royal Horse Show that is a very prestigious international equestrian competition.

You should refrain from bumping a post. Your two posts could have been combined by opening the first and pressing the edit button. Double posting like this is frowned on by the board management.

I am glad to see you like Timmy's (as we call it up here) because they produce the best fast food donuts. Krispy Kreme tried to come to Canada, but went broke in the attempt.

If you get a chance to come up to the big cities in Canada, you will be even more entranced. Toronto has daily papers published in more than 100 languages. It is the hot spot of our multicultural mosaic. Montreal provides an entry to the panache of the European style of living, much more typified by Quebec City. Vancouver is a big, bustling western city that will host the 2010 Winter Olympics. Whee!

Other major cities you might like to visit are: Calgary (oil patch), Edmonton (edge of the North), Regina (home of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police academy), Thunder Bay (at the top of Lake Superior), Ottawa (the capital).

My wife has just accused me of writing a book, but we are talking about my country. If you have more questions, just ask.

What would you like to eat and drink?

[Zelgadis 638]

Oh, I gotta have that Canadian flag smiley!

Just discovered Harvey's today! Oh man, that was the best fast food burger I've ever had. Even better than Rally's!

ISF

[ephorex_77 0]

*Pops in and finds that bunny slippers have decayed into nothingness*

*Puts hand on heart and hums the British national anthem due to inexperience and to reaffirm his Australian citizenship*

 

*Pats the zukes and settles rear into comfy chair*

 

 

[HRH_King_Newb 0]

Date: 8/18/2005 8:20:28 PM Author: N_O_Body @ HRH_King_Newb:  My friend, if I were you, I wouldn't be co-opting a title that can only be conferred by the Queen.  HRH means you are a member of the Royal Family.  This, I seriously doubt.
But no matter, welcome to the Moose Factory.  As you may have read in the previous 45 or so pages, Moose Factory is on an original Canadian reservation across the Moose River from Moosonee, which is about two spits and a holler from James Bay.  So you really have come upon a Canadian venue. http://www3.sympatico.ca/john.winterton/SmilieCanada.gif>
Service in the Moose Factory virtual bar and grill is handled by the autosystem,  which consists of an autochef and an autobar, along with various automated support.  It works telepathically, so if you will definitely decide what you want, think hard about it, and it will arrive by teleporter with appropriate service.
Canada welcomes everyone, unless you have a criminal record or are a known terrorist.  If you want to see the throes of immigration, take a look at the last few posts by Zelgadis in this thread.  Zelgadis has just arrived in Toronto from Kentucky; just in time for the largest fair in the country, and should go to the Canadian National Exhibition which is playing just now on the lakeshore.  Later on, for horsey types, there is the Royal Agricultural Winter Fair in the same place (Exhibition Park, Toronto) which comes complete with the Royal Horse Show that is a very prestigious international equestrian competition.
You should refrain from bumping a post.  Your two posts could have been combined by opening the first and pressing the edit button.  Double posting like this is frowned on by the board management.
I am glad to see you like Timmy's (as we call it up here) because they produce the best fast food donuts.  Krispy Kreme tried to come to Canada, but went broke in the attempt.
If you get a chance to come up to the big cities in Canada, you will be even more entranced.  Toronto has daily papers published in more than 100 languages.  It is the hot spot of our multicultural mosaic.  Montreal provides an entry to the panache of the European style of living, much more typified by Quebec City.  Vancouver is a big, bustling western city that will host the 2010 Winter Olympics.  Whee!
Other major cities you might like to visit are: Calgary (oil patch), Edmonton (edge of the North), Regina (home of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police academy),  Thunder Bay (at the top of Lake Superior), Ottawa (the capital).
My wife has just accused me of writing a book, but we are talking about my country.  If you have more questions, just ask.
What would you like to eat and drink?

Hey, thanks for all the info.  No, I am not a member of the royal family, and I would change my screen name if I could.  I guess I didn't consider potentially offending citizens of countries of the Commonwealth of Nations or the United Kingdom.  Please accept my humble apology.

 

I finally understand what bumping means, and I'll try not to do it again.

 

To start me off, I'll just have some Clearly Canadian spring water, if you do carry other brands of food or drink.  Is there a gift shop here?  I'd sure like a Moose Factory mug.

 

About Thunder Bay, my father has told me several times that if you left Sault Ste. Marie in the direction of Thunder Bay and got on the route to Thunder Bay (sorry, I can't remember the exact name of the road) you wouldn't run into any major towns for about 600-800 miles.  All this talk about driving reminds me: What does it mean when I'm sitting at a red light in Sault Ste. Marie, and the light turns green, but it's flashing?  Just curious.

 

How about those Calgary Flames?  Winning the Stanley Cup in six against the Maple Leafs this past season?

 

**EDIT**: It's 10:41 AM now (11:41 EST) and I almost bumped again, but I caught myself.  Would it please the community if I rejoined Simtropolis under a different name, to avoid any confrontation with people who think I may be mocking the royal family?  Would this be wise, or even polite? Is it practical?  Would it even fix anything?  If this goes through, I'll find a way to ask a moderator to delete all my previous posts, and we can all forget my unintentional disrespect.

 

I know it's probably not that simple, but I just want to avoid controversy as a member of Simtropolis.  If the community wants to banish me for life, so be it.  If it wants to let me stay, under a new name, with a new avatar, with a new signature, so be it.  What's right for the community is right for me.  It's mostly your call.  Let me stay (under a new name) or tell me to stay away.

[ephorex_77 0]

Anyone who tells you to stay away from ST on account of your unintentional slighting of the respect deserved by the royal title shouldn't be here. I doubt anyone has actually considered baning you because of that name.

 

I'm of the opinion that you should stay here with the same name. IMO, it's the content of posts that matter, I respect cordial, thoughful and unpresumptious posts, the likes of which you have made.

 

Oh yes, a glass of ginger ale would be great bartender. Going to attend a state Indonesian speaking competition soon, and I need something to drink.

[Zelgadis 638]

Nothing for me today thanks, because I JUST FOUND KRISPY KREME IN TORONTO!!! Oh yes, I was shouting.

So, Tim Hortons can stick their swill where the sun don't shine.

So remember boys and girls:

KK = Good!
KKK = Bad!
TH = Blech!

So, king newb, you want to move to Canada? The process is very complicated, but as a person who has been through the system, I will be more than happy to give you advice. No matter how old you are, it pays to start thinking about ways to ease your immigration hassle now so that you can plan your future.

PM me if you would like advice. I've been there and done that.

ISF

[Lyhoko Leaci 770]

*The megleeches are loaded into a cargo transport headed to Leech Labs on the planet Myon*

*orders some medium steak, and the zukes order some crispy steak.*

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

Hey, don't get me wrong, I was just a little touchy over the royalty because of a recent kerfuffle here. Sorry if anyone was offended.

Krispy Kreme is a synonym for hot and greasy. Not my bag of calories, as I am a type 2 diabetic. All those fats are definitely bad for me. Timmy's bakes their donuts. If you want good coffee make it at home. Next time you must go to a Timmy's though, try an Iced Capuccino.

Announcement

Just downloaded to the STEX
The Moose Factory Bar and Grill
A 2 x 1 CS

[Shadow Assassin 336]

Ah, excellent. Now I can have the Moose Factory with its own abbatoir.

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

Date: 8/20/2005 11:05:27 AM
Author: Shadow_Assassin
Ah, excellent. Now I can have the Moose Factory with its own abbatoir.

quote>

Fine with me. You should remember that the autosystem and the related pantries and storage are under the parking lot.

Feel free to add a couple of more buildings, and probably some more property to the lot. The abbatoir needs its own blood tanks and someplace to put the stuff that goes to the rendering plant. You'll also need a big cooling fridge and a freezer. Have fun.

[Zelgadis 638]

BTW, did I mention that I now live less than a quarter of a block from the enterance to the Exposition? I haven't been there yet, but we've certainly been able to hear it.

ISF

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

Neat. I guess that means you are somewhere around Dufferin Street. The Exhibition [sic] is quite a party. You should try to take in the Air Show, which is in the last few days.

Have fun.

[Shadow Assassin 336]

Heh. Can I have a White Hot Chocolate to go?

Do you like my new sig?

[Zelgadis 638]

Absolutely correct, N_O_Body. However, I'll just leave it at that for to go into more detail would be revealing too much.

Still, nice place to be. Convenient to everything.

ISF

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

@Shadow_Assassin: Nice job on your sig. Ping Enjoy your drin,

@Zelgadis: So now you are a west-ender. I always lived east of Yonge Street, but that area is quite nice. My wife used to work at the GE Lamp Plant on Dufferin, but I think it is now closed. Small world, eh?

P.S. Note new sig. I am not sure I like this as well as the old one.

[Lyhoko Leaci 770]

It is a little hard to read everything before it goes back to the beginning, otherwise it is good.

*The zukes begin wandering around the building.*

[The Terminator 0]

*takes off the girls clothes and has a Shake

Im in the Bahamas on holiday now, i really dont like it, to many Snobby suburbanites. im at this stupid teen club there playing only rap music, but its the only place i can get internet. there playing rap music...Bleh!!!!. Its to fancy for me, im staying at the atlantis paradise island i dont reccoment it, to many snobs its not very user friendly, and the food sucks, NO MCDONALDS!!! lol! but the beach is good, and theres alot of good boat rides.

Well im here till friday, ill log on everynight and say hi.

- A very sunburned TT

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

Thanks, Leech 10. I think I'll change the font and decrease the frame rate so it is a little slower. This font has problems on sites that have dark backgrounds.

TT, I hope you are having a good time. I haven't been to Bermuda since sometime in the 1970's. Where are you staying?

[ACEfanatic 7]

*walks in, sits at bar.
*signals N_O_Body for a cherry coke.

@TT - The bahamas aren't that bad... Though, I guess I fit into the catagorey of middle-class white snob so maybe my opinion is biased.

Also, in response to the last page:  I prefer ignorantly being control by a Facist to willingly be controlled by a Communist.

-ACE

[A Nonny Moose 8,262]

@ACEfanatic: The autosystem will serve you. ... Poof! ... Would you like something to eat?

[rybolton 135]

John,

 

May I have a Simtropolitan please?

 

Cheers!

[guinea 31]

*Taps ry on his shoulder*

Boo !

 

 

john please may i have a pizza ... im starving
Thanks

[rybolton 135]

*startled*

 

How's my favorite rodent?  You know John, I think I'll have a Pinky and The Brain Freeze with my Simtropolitian and would you mind an order of Aronion Rings?  (Just in case you're wondering, those are Onion Rings that smell like Ass!)    They're for someone else...