Legions of football fans in Rodentia were disappointed and subsequently enraged this last Sunday when they eagerly turned on their televisions expecting to catch the broadcast of the Squirrelton Fighting Squirrels playing against their division rivals the Marmot Hollow Woodchippers and instead were treated to a three-hour long fireside chat by the mayor of the seaside town Isle of Mouse Nancy Pelosi-Groundsquirrel (not to be confused with Rep. Nancy Pelosi- D. 8th District, CA, US House Minority Leader). Political pundits and policy wonks lauded the event, calling it “evocative” and “a brave move that will surely reframe the political discourse in Rodentia.” Michael Nutter, mayor of Squirrelton (and avid Fighting Squirrels fan) dismissed the event, huffily telling reporters “Well, it was a game changer.” Here are excerpts from her (strangely familiar) speech:
“Good evening, friends and fellow citizens of Rodentia. Fourscore and seven years ago our fathers and mothers brought forth on this regional map a new nation, conceived in liberty and dedicated to the proposition that all rodents everywhere must be treated with respect, valor, and utmost regard.”
“The mayors of Marmot Hollow, Squirrelton, Ratsfjord, and Gopher’s Pocket have been spreading unfounded rumors involving Isle of Mouse and my political career and they seem to be testing whether Rodentia or any nation so conceived and so dedicated can long endure. Isle of Mouse remains a town faithful to rodents and not, as mayors Michael Nutter, Ishamael Rotte, or Nibbly Murphy would have you believe, turned to the worship of sea urchins and horseshoe crabs.”
“Both Isle of Mouse and I, Nancy Pelosi-Goundsquirrel, have only struggled tirelessly to advance the interests of rodents, as rodents have consecrated Rodentia far above our poor power to add or detract. Our town, although maritime in orientation and tropical in clime, remains faithful to all species that have ever-growing incisors.”
“It is true coconut and banana trees grow freely along our many sandy shores and beaches. But, friends, I assure you those fruits are used to feed rats, mice, and cavies rather than dolphin, manatee, or coconut crabs.”
“Let us not allow the voices of mayoral disgruntlement and envy stray us from our path. Even as we of Isle of Mouse sleep in our beds at night, listening to the waves of the Hamster Water Bottle Sea, it is rather for us to be dedicated to the great task remaining before us.”
“Despite the tensions present between mayors in Rodentia, I assure you, friends and fellow citizens, under my tenure as mayor the Isle of Mouse and Rodentia shall have a new birth of freedom, and that government of the people and rodents, by the people and rodents, and for the people and rodents shall not perish from the earth.”
Credits: Mods are SimPeg (MTP, SPAM, OWW, Pond, Stream, Lighthouse, (lots and mayor-mode ploppables)) Murimk’s rocks, ALN Pasture Flora, Cycledogg trees, SFBT trees, Godiva MMPs, HBS Tropical flora, NAM & SAM, Lowkee33’s Appalachian terrain, SHK HD Rock Mod & HD Brigantine 2.0, Riverside Beach Mod, BATs by Matt325, MadHatter, JB
Pelosi-Groundsquirrel’s wording in her speech is heavily borrowed from Lincoln’s famous Gettysburg Address Speech. Minus my corny rodent humor, the actual Gettysburg Address is actually a pretty incredible piece of writing. One of my favorites in US History, second only to James Madison’s Federalist No. 10
@Schulmanator: Oh Nooo! “Isle of Cat” Me too, because it’s not hard to guess who would win that one
@hahei: Thanks! Cats not liking water is the same principle behind Squirrelton’s defensive aerosol product Cat-B-Gone, which contains only water.
@Hazani Pratama: Thank you—so glad you like it
Sep 27, 2012 - 11:43 PM
@Hellken: Thanks so much! This is the first city tile I tried to have more of a tropical climate-feel to it.
@Jacob Guajardo: Hey, thanks! I live in a pretty large urban area so I guess I miss nature so it comes out in my City Journal.
@SimCoug: Thanks. You and Paeng are kind of my SimCity role-models so your comment is much appreciated! Pelosi-Groundsquirrel keeps most of her money in off-shore accounts and has yet to disclose her tax returns so the nature and extent of her wealth is questionable
@Blakeway: Glad you’re back, Lord!
@NMUSpidey: Thanks! Hahaha, MOUSECAR may very well become an extremely popular event in Rodentia. A lot of bankers and ambitious young lawyers in Squirrelton are already caught up in the Rat Race, however