The Corrupted Charity Game

[MandelSoft 2,769]

The Corrupted Charity Game - Good Deeds, Bad Mindset

Everyone does a good deed once in a while. This game starts with a good deed or "mentality" like:

"I should not kill someone else."

The point of this game is to give a reason why you did this... and do it for all the wrong reasons, like:

• Greed ("spending money on weapons is expensive")
• Selfishness ("I can never get the blood stains out of my shirt!")
• Unusual practical reasons ("I can't kill someone, because I'd miss my appointment then")
• Hidden evil ("It's much more fun to see someone suffer for a long time")

Here are the rules:

• Each post must give a bad reason for the good deed above and should state the next good deed.
• The 2 post rule is in effect, as with any forum game. If you are unsure what that is, go see the forum game rules.
• Spamming is strictly prohibited and doing so will have you be smitten by bunnies.

OK, shall we begin?

 

"I will keep to traffic rules while driving on the road"

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

So that I don't get pulled over while hauling all sorts of illegal substances and dead bodies.

 

*I will help old ladies cross the street.

[Terring 6,473]

Only after they pay me for my services

 

I'll help kitties sticked in trees

[MandelSoft 2,769]

I was getting sick and tired of their meowing

 

* I do my best to help out customers.

[GeometryMath Algebra 614]

So I could steal their money.

I'd help earthquake hit cities...

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

...if it meant massive profits from the victims' sufferings.

 

I'd volunteer more often...

[ROFLyoshi 1,760]

For the IRA.

I would donate some spare change for my local church...

[GeometryMath Algebra 614]

...so I could be damned for not having any money at all.

I'd spend billions of pesos for improving the infrastructure of the Philippines...

[The Avatar 1,089]

...so the people would worship me as their supreme ruler.

 

I will help out at a local soup kitchen...

[MandelSoft 2,769]

... so I can poison the soup when no-one's looking

 

I'm helping primary school students out with their maths...

[Terring 6,473]

... to make them depended on me

I saved a girl from a thief...

[KonstantinII 1,106]

Because she is Dr.Vu's top spy!

 

I help animals get out of the zoo.

[RipRap 4,400]

So that they can ravage the entire city.

 

I will donate money to Salvation Army...

[Bipin 3,402]

...which is actually a cleverly named terror front (seriously, I always thought the "Salvation Army" sounded like one of those "Peoples Army of XYZ" terror fronts).

 

I will donate a kidney...

[Schulmanator 5,787]

... as a detonator for a new class of bio-explosives.

 

 

I will help old ladies to cross the street...

[The Pennsylvania Turnpike 252]

For a fee of $50

 

I won't cause a traffic jam

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

...devoting instead my time and efforts to large-scale traffic accidents and other major calamities.

 

I will be kinder to the environment...

[GeometryMath Algebra 614]

...and I would wipe out all technology, making us go back to the pre-historic world.

 

I'll impeach corrupt politicians...

[ROFLyoshi 1,760]

And replace their positions with my unqualified friends.

I'll cut taxes...

[Cpt Johnny 57]

...and implement conscription in Australia XD

 

I'll give up my seat for the elderly, disabled and pregnant on public transport...

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

...so that I can drop the elbow on them once they're seated.

 

I'll pick up trash when I see it in public...

[Bipin 3,402]

...then sell it for a fee to the poor and the homeless.

 

I'll become a paramedic...

[Cpt Johnny 57]

...and drop the stretcher every time I'm helping to carry an overweight person.

 

I'll become a fireman...

[T Wrecks 10,209]

... to simulate playing SC2013 in real life by sending all the fire trucks to form a conga line at a trashcan fire upon receiving an emergency call while the rest of the city is burning down to embers.

 

Everybody should plant a tree...

 

[EDIT: No hard feelings, please let's not turn this into another SC2013 flame war. Har, har.]

[MandelSoft 2,769]

... weed trees.

 

I'll invest in social welfare...

[Lot Creator 304]

To help myself to a cup of chocolate milk everytime!

 

I shall invest more money into the SpaceX program...

[KonstantinII 1,106]

To blow up the Moon!

 

I will visit the North Pole supposedly as a scientist.

[NMUSpidey 3,956]

...and then just skinny dip with the polar bears, accomplishing nothing of any note whatsoever!  MWAHAHAHAHA!

 

I will be extra coureous to other drivers when I am out on the road...

[GeometryMath Algebra 614]

...so I could start a 100 vehicle pile up.

 

I shall learn modding and join the NAM team...

[MandelSoft 2,769]

... to destroy the NAM from within.

 

I'll get a decent job...