Queensferry ---> WINNING

[Dumanios 35]

Aah, but my CJ region also has Spaceships!

[§haÅ--Ñ€ §hÅŽo 370]

Hah hah hah hah. I get it, it's a pun!

[Lyhoko Leaci 770]

Heh, one of the bombs is rebelling and flying back up to blow up the planes.

And you say you have spaceships, but none seem to exist here.

[BuggUla 405]

Hammering

Currently in Queensferry...

General Rancor, I have most excellent news about our campaign to crush the wicked and evil enemy.

What have you found out, Col. Nelson?

These captured documents indicate that the enemy is moving their capital city inland to avoid bomber strikes. It appears to be along the western shore of the inland sea.

THOSE FOOLS! Do they think they can escape us?

Apparently so, your royal bugginess. What do you plan on doing about it?

ATTACK! ATTACK!

Meanwhile, back in Schulmania...

The town of Hammers sits on the northern tip of Pellissippi Island, just off the Tenne mainland.

The town and the coast are protected by Fort Claw, on the southern end of the island.

Fort Claw is the key to northwestern defenses.

Of course the town and the fort do not have any idea that they have just been targeted for attack. Nor should they suspect anything, being so far from the war zone. But, distance may not prove a suitable barrier to attack.

In her Hammers home, Mr. and Mrs. Clinton Hammers are preparing for high tea, when she hears a loud sound overhead.

Here comes the bomber with 2 escort fighters...

Incendiary bombs are being dropped indiscriminately along the length of the island. (I have to wonder why they painted lines on the ground outside the fort... was it for drill formations? Anywho, at least it's not a bulls eye.)

As the bombs start raining down, the venerable stone fort quickly goes up in flames.

Our balloon squad did not get a chance to take flight, as the armory was one of the first buildings to go up in flames.

As soldiers raced for cover, some noticed that the adjoining dense woods also were burning. Unless someone put a stop to this, the whole island would be consumed.

There would be no sanctuary from the repeated bombings and the strafing runs by the Bugg-13 escort planes.

I just noticed that the drill formation lines have burned off the ground.

The complex is being evacuated before it's too late...

A final blast from a two ton Army Ant Bomb blasts the fort to bits and leaves a significant crater in its destructive wake.

Flaming debris fueled forest fires and soon the island was totally ablaze. Residents of Hammers fled to the shoreline, abandoning their doomed town and awaiting relief from naval vessels en route from Knoxvegas. The fire soon swept through the area and leveled the town.

Luckily, casualties in Hammers were low, but the town and Fort Claw are total losses.

[Follarch 326]

Uh ohs...

[§haÅ--Ñ€ §hÅŽo 370]

I don't quite understand... So is this Schulmania attacked or Queensferry?

[Craig-Abcvs 1,595]

This attack is a despicable and totally unjustified outrage against Schulmania.

[Evillions 552]

Schulmania was attacked, the italics are Schulmania and the normal text is Queensferry.

[Bigbuilder 0]

Things are not looking good for Schulmania at the moment. In the end, though, Schulmania shall prevail.

[Bigbuilder 0]

Things are not looking good for Schulmania at the moment. In the end, though, Schulmania shall prevail.

[BuggUla 405]

Supporters Tally:

Look who loves Queensferry now! And, to you, WE LOVE YOU too! Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

Supporters Tally:

Look who loves Queensferry now! And, to you, WE LOVE YOU too! Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

Dumanios They too will fall under our spell. They will also love us, as we do you.

Sirron Kcuhc We are hilarious! And we love you! (A winning combination!)

Leech10 We do have spaceships, but we don't need them when the enemy is on the same planet and only 4200 km away. We love spaceships... as we do you. Hee hee hee!

Archean Isn't it TERRIFIC!? All hail victory! Death to all! All hail BuggUla! Death to all! We love you!

Sirron Kcuhc HA! They could NEVER attack us! Hee hee hee! So funny! We love you and your humor!

Abcvs Of course it is justified... once they showed up in our territory, they received the usual treatment for outsiders: death, misery and destruction. That's the price for not being part of our beloved hive. We love the hive, as we do you.

Evillions Of course! As if those puny weaklings could do anything to our mighty nation. All hail victory! Death to all! All hail Queensferry! Death to all! We love you!

Bigbuilder Impossible! We are invincible. All hail victory! We love you.... Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

Dumanios They too will fall under our spell. They will also love us, as we do you.

Sirron Kcuhc We are hilarious! And we love you! (A winning combination!)

Leech10 We do have spaceships, but we don't need them when the enemy is on the same planet and only 4200 km away. We love spaceships... as we do you. Hee hee hee!

Archean Isn't it TERRIFIC!? All hail victory! Death to all! All hail BuggUla! Death to all! We love you!

Sirron Kcuhc HA! They could NEVER attack us! Hee hee hee! So funny! We love you and your humor!

Abcvs Of course it is justified... once they showed up in our territory, they received the usual treatment for outsiders: death, misery and destruction. That's the price for not being part of our beloved hive. We love the hive, as we do you.

Evillions Of course! As if those puny weaklings could do anything to our mighty nation. All hail victory! Death to all! All hail Queensferry! Death to all! We love you!

Bigbuilder Impossible! We are invincible. All hail victory! We love you.... Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

Dumanios They too will fall under our spell. They will also love us, as we do you.

Sirron Kcuhc We are hilarious! And we love you! (A winning combination!)

Leech10 We do have spaceships, but we don't need them when the enemy is on the same planet and only 4200 km away. We love spaceships... as we do you. Hee hee hee!

Archean Isn't it TERRIFIC!? All hail victory! Death to all! All hail BuggUla! Death to all! We love you!

Sirron Kcuhc HA! They could NEVER attack us! Hee hee hee! So funny! We love you and your humor!

Abcvs Of course it is justified... once they showed up in our territory, they received the usual treatment for outsiders: death, misery and destruction. That's the price for not being part of our beloved hive. We love the hive, as we do you.

Evillions Of course! As if those puny weaklings could do anything to our mighty nation. All hail victory! Death to all! All hail Queensferry! Death to all! We love you!

Bigbuilder Impossible! We are invincible. All hail victory! We love you.... Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

As you can tell from this photo from a spontaneous protest, everyone is against Schulmania. Join us on our quest for world domination... we have free "apple" cake for all who join us!

Join us today! We love you! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

As you can tell from this photo from a spontaneous protest, everyone is against Schulmania. Join us on our quest for world domination... we have free "apple" cake for all who join us!

Join us today! We love you! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

As you can tell from this photo from a spontaneous protest, everyone is against Schulmania. Join us on our quest for world domination... we have free "apple" cake for all who join us!

Join us today! We love you! Hee hee hee!

[BuggUla 405]

As you can tell from this photo from a spontaneous protest, everyone is against Schulmania. Join us on our quest for world domination... we have free "apple" cake for all who join us!

Join us today! We love you! Hee hee hee!

[kj3400 178]

I'm almost positive abcvs will take offense to that. I take that back. Completely positive.

[Dumanios 35]

Being a Karate expert, I believe that some dogs would object as well.

[BuggUla 405]

We're cooking up another attack... you'll love it! Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee!

[Hester 699]

Give up Buggula! It'll all go against you.

[BuggUla 405]

kj3400 He has had a slice of Uncle John's famous homemade seven layer "apple" cake... he is one of us now... we love him! And we love you! Hee hee hee!

Dumanios Any dog who objects to Queensferry will have a regiment of fleas sent over to subdue at once. None will resist. All hail victory! Death to all! All hail Queensferry! Death to all! Hee hee hee. Hee hee hee. We love you <3

Hester We think not! Hee hee hee... hee hee hee. Though we love your dedication to Queensferry.

[Hester 699]

We'll just see about that BuggUla!

[BuggUla 405]

An interesting item from Schulmania's 2008 Volume 1... think they have figured it out yet? Hehehehe... our time machine is working

Something Evil This Way Cometh

A Scheme to Destabilize Schulmania

The Hacking Restoration Commission

Full Commission Report

A cyberspace attack on Schulmania in May 2008 has been unsuccessful in permanently impacting the Supreme Wirdle's serene domain. Some damage was seen in posts across the entire thread, but backups of nearly all posts have made recovery very easy. The Supreme Wirdle appointed Archduke B. B. Bower to be in charge of restoration efforts. The Supreme Wirdle has appointed a blue ribbon panel of experts to determine the cause of the attack. Right now, attention has been focused upon this cat:

 

Chief Investigator Dan Dfnva reported on page 262 of Schulmania that this cat was seen on multiple occasions during the Simtropolis downtimes. Upon further investigation, the sightings have been independently confirmed. The question is, then, is this cat a traitor to Schulmania? Or, is there a far more complex and far more sinister answer to this question? Sir Leech, a member of the Council of New Atkinos, suggested on page 262 of Schulmania that the cat in question might not be a cat at all.

Forensic experts have been called to review the evidence. Dr. Joe Tropian is leading the investigation. Several clues have been found at the cyber scene of the crime. Back at his mysterious, secret, underground lab, Dr. Joe is looking at several key pieces of evidence. What he was expecting to find on the first genetic sample was this:

This is cat DNA. If this was a match with the sample collected at the crime scene, a troubling situation arises: a cat disloyal to the Supreme Wirdle, bent on destroying her nation. If it doesn't match, we have an equally troubling situation: an unknown enemy with the same intent. It is hard to determine which is worse.

The genetic material recovered at the scene had this pattern:

Obviously, not a match. Something else is going on here. Perhaps Sir Leech was right. But, an interesting thing, never before detected, was also noted on the sample. The sample showed signs of a temporal anomaly - chroniton particles were detected. Not what you would expect from anything which belonged in the Schulmania timeframe.

This would indicate that the "cat" in question is a visitor from another time period. Very troubling. The Supreme Wirdle was informed at once. The identity of the assailant is still unknown, but a few valuable clues have been discovered. It is known that the assailant is not a cat, but has been disguised as one, possibly to infiltrate Schulmania. The assailant seems to be from another time period and another clue was found - a faint footprint visible just outside of Schulmania's borders...

New Atkinos Councilman Matthew Spidey summoned Dr. Smarty to review the evidence. Back in the lab, a valuable clue was detected. It was nearly skipped at first. But, an intensive review of Matlock re-runs and a CSI marathon from DVD box sets, it was determined that this print has an identifying characteristic. Using near ultraviolet light, a letter was seen imprinted in the heel. It was the letter "Q".

This disturbing new information has been reported to the Supreme Wirdle, who will release a statement later on this topic. She has already issued a decree ordering the completion of restoration efforts, currently stalled at page 200. She has also declared that June 2008 will be officially designated as "Simtropolis Rocks Month" in honor of the efforts of members and administrators to take care of the site. The Supreme Wirdle is dedicated to preserving Schulmania and will vigorously protect her domain.

---

BuggUla expresses thanks to the estate of Dr. Emmett Brown for the flux capacitor plans... WE LOVE HIM!!! Hee hee hee! Hee hee hee! <3

[Hester 699]

Oh man..how wonderful that they are still on the job of sleuthing out who was responsible. By the way, it was so nice seeing those names of CJ creators from several years ago, I enjoyed them and their CJ's and hate to see them gone. OR I just don't know their current CJ titles.

[BuggUla 405]

In preparation for our next assault, we have approved dropping these propaganda flyers all across the enemy coastline and into the interior of their wretched land. Hopefully they will wise up and surrender now. They will soon be able to embrace us and share in BuggUla's love for them. Of course, all who resist shall be ruthlessly pursued and mercilessly pummeled.

Be looking for a glorious attack soon. And join in now to share in the plunder. All hail victory! Death to all! All hail Queensferry! Death to all!

---

Want to join the Queensferry military? OF COURSE YOU DO! How can you join us? It's simple... just partake of the fine introductory beverage below and await further instructions.

[The Duke 11]

Can we just ship over a giant can of Raid to Queensferry and spray it on Buggula and the other critters?? I think it would be very effective!!

[BuggUla 405]

Storming the Mainland

Cape Eastway, district capital of East Devonshire and largest city in the district, has been prospering thanks to the war buildup. The three divisions of the IV Corps are based here and the Cape Eastway Naval Base is the home of the four squadrons of the Third Fleet.

Although civilians were evacuated from coastal areas and combat zones at the onset of hostilities, essential and military personnel remain in the city. Governor Bird has been bouncing between supporting the military buildup and looking for ways to turn a quick wartime profit.

Governor Bird is trying to shed her image as the least effective and most corrupt leader in the nation. Having a road use tax for military convoys is probably not the way to do that. Especially when the tax goes straight to her pocket.

Defensive fortifications are hastily being built in the Devonian piedmont while Cape Eastway serves mainly as a naval center of operations. There has been some turbulence in the waters lately due to the inept management of Vice Admiral Rosco P. Coltrane. Chief Admiral Hestorb has been quite displeased with the performance of his ships in confrontations to date and his inability to penetrate the Queensferry blockade. She has been traveling overland from the western Devonshire coast to inspect the facilities and replace him with Commodore Soixante Quatre. And if she thinks she is displeased with Vice Admiral Coltrane, just wait till she sees this:

A task force of enemy vessels has left occupied territory offshore and is heading toward Cape Eastway.

If Schulmania had the capability to intercept electronic messages, they would have seen this dispatch, sent by Queensferry General Kay Oss to the occupation force on "Love Island":

All hail victory! Death to all! All hail BuggUla! Death to all! You are hereby ordered to steam out of Love Island and attack the coast of our hapless enemy at once. You are authorized to send 20 ships and use 40 aircraft. Take their city and reduce it to rubble. Take no prisoners. Have a nice day.

As several thousand members of the enemy task force approach, Admiral Hestorb is left with a naval force in disarray and an inept governor who has failed to adequately prepare the district capital for an invasion. Luckily she is coming with two divisions of troops equipped with the latest weaponry, including gunpowder. And she presided over the opening of the Schulmania National Air Force's newest facility, the Mercaptan Air Base, an airstrip for balloon assisted aircraft brought in from Maxis City. She is about as ready as she is going to get.

Upon arrival in Cape Eastway, Hestorb finds a disorganized city and a governor preoccupied with selecting new tile for the kitchen floor. Once Hestorb has installed her new naval leader, she immediately commands the army units to develop defensive positions outside the city. Meanwhile, Governor Bird has selected a buff ceramic tile for the floor. And now the arduous task of finding new curtains to coordinate...

Hestorb, on the other hand, is coordinating defensive plans. She has ordered the installation of 20 of the newly invented cannons along the coast to defend Cape Eastway and its strategic naval base.

Personal gunpowder-driven weapons have also been issued to Schulmania's troops. This should help even the technological imbalance which aided Queensferry's early wins.

From a position offshore, the Queensferry navy takes aim at Cape Eastway. The ships have a much greater firing range than Schulmania's forces, so they can pepper the coast with virtual impunity. The enemy ships have been sighted and the alarm sounded. Much to Queensferry's surprise, volleys of cannon fire greeted the incoming vessels, compliments of the IV Corps 8th Division 122nd Regiment Archers.

Sgt. Midnight Black mans his long range cannon on the southwestern edge of town. His orders: blast anything with more than four legs.

Enemy ships had come in clase because of the lack of resistance shown thus far. When the cannons opened up, they were able to score a few hits. Of course, the enemy ships immediately returned fire.

We scored a few hits! Satisfying, isn't it?

The naval bombardment begins as the big guns on the enemy vessels open up on coastal defenses and the town itself, softening Schulmania's military for the eventual ground landing.

Shells started falling indiscriminately across town. Had the town not been largely evacuated, the losses would have been huge.

Government facilities are also hit.

Smoke plumes and flames rose all over town. No fire brigades were dispatched; everyone was focused on preventing the enemy from landing. All efforts were concentrated on attacking incoming enemy ships.

Concentrated fire near the naval base resulted in a huge explosion. Massive incendiary shells pummeled the spot repeatedly.

Undaunted, defenders keep up the attack. And Admiral Hestorb's Third Fleet joins the fight. Sailing out from the base on the north side of town, she attacks the right flank of the enemy line, catching them off guard as they focused on the town. Her ships, now equipped with cannon as well, inflict considerable damage upon the enemy. Air support was provided by Balloon Squad 7, stationed at Mercaptan. Those all of the hot air balloons were shot down, many delivered their payloads on target and aided in the destruction of several enemy vessels. Mig Thundercatuel and Kenny Jay, two of Simtropolis' pioneering airmen, will return to fight again against this most evil enemy.

One battleship was destroyed and several smaller vessels were forced to flee. The losses for Schulmania's navy were extensive - seven vessels sunk and five damaged and included the ships bearing Simtropolis scions Brick Tamlane and Sir Tricky.

Admiral Hestorb was forced to withdraw the Third Fleet and deployed III Squadron of the Second Fleet to cover their repositioning. An unceasing exchange of cannon fire accompanied this maneuver. III Squadron attacked the left flank and inflicted moderate losses.

Facing mounting losses and the potential of losing nearly all of the eastern fleet, Hestorb decides to withdraw and regroup at Woods of Wayne. It would now fall to the army to repel the invasion. At least the invasion force has been reduced by over 20% due to the attacks by naval forces.

Admiral Hestorb sails off to Woods of Wayne Naval Base. From there, she will rebuild the eastern fleet and prepare to take on the enemy once more.

Meanwhile, the center of Queensferry's forces is continuing to shell the town, now also accompanied by attack helicopters and bombers.

Helicopter gunships are on the way.

Fires are staring all over town from the shelling and from strafing by the helicopters.

This massive fire was spawned when a Schulminion cannonball struck an attacking Queensferry helicopter, sending it spiraling into the building.

Unfortunately, a lack of anti aircraft weapons allows Queensferry's helicopters and bombers largely unchallenged airspace over Cape Eastway.

A bomb from a Queensferry QF-29 Smirkmaster lands in the governor's backyard.

Governor Bird's cage was clearly rattled by this assault. She'd clearly had enough. After stuffing her bags with as many schulmonetas as she could cram in, she took off out the window and flew toward safety. Having abandoned her post, she then faced the task of navigating through substantial enemy fire to get out of town. Dodging bullets disoriented her and caused her to drop her ill-gotten fortune. Confused and flitting about desperately trying to avoid being shot, she headed toward what seemed to be a sector of relative calm. Exhausted and with feathers singed, she finally lighted on a ship off the coast, hoping for respite and perhaps to command the captain to go back and retrieve her cash. Only one problem: she landed on an enemy vessel.

"Welcome aboard. Welcome to Queensferry. We love you. Won't you join us for dessert? We're having Uncle John's famous seven layer "apple" cake. We insist."

As if things weren't bad enough already, Queensferry bombers continued to soften up Schulminion positions with carpet bombing.

By this point, there's not much of Cape Eastway left to fight over...

Queensferry's invasion force anticipates another easy victory. Troop transports laden with would-be conquerors start streaming toward the shore. A force of nearly 3,000 infantry is headed to establish an enemy beachhead on our territory. They anticipate little resistance. They do not realize that Field Marshal Mooky has over 3,000 defenders assembled just outside of town. This is the strongest force yet fielded by Schulmania. And these soldiers are equipped with new technology.

They are coming to conquer... and we will stand our ground and defeat them. Coming up next: the ground battle begins in earnest. Stay tuned for the conclusion of the Battle of Cape Eastway!