ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

[Deever 23]

A: I don't really know. Just help us pick up the pieces and put him back together again...

Q: Who invented technology?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Al Gore. He invented the interwebs!!!!1

Q: What is the subliminal message being played on the radio?

[IDS2 3,346]

pickled_pig...come to the slaughterhouse...

Why does my clock shoe the wrong time?

[Vigilante1987 180]

A: You forgot to wind it.

Q: Where did I put my glasses?

[ky72x 13]

A: On top of the pine tree, but it could be in the garbage disposal.

Q: How much does 80 hours cost?

[IDS2 3,346]

Who cares?

Will this flashlight break if I hit it with a hammer?

[Vigilante1987 180]

Let's try it and find out.

How many 2-penny nails can I buy for $100?

[Lyhoko Leaci 770]

However many fit in the cash register.

Why did someone make a gallium coin if it melts in your hand?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Because they couldn't find the unnunnium to make an unnunnium coin.

Q: What did one hydrogen ion say to the other?

[IDS2 3,346]

Watch out for oxygen!

Why do people pickle pecks of peppered pigs?

[Vigilante1987 180]

What else are you going to do with a peck of peppered pigs?

If I could fly, would I be a bird?

[Crazy_Carrot 0]

No, you would be an ufo

Who put the sun in the sky?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Geocentric Giovanni put the sun in the sky.

Q: In which country did the emo kid vacation?

[IDS2 3,346]

Colombia, in Medellin.

Where can socks be bought?

[octaves 4]

In the land past the back of the drying machine...

Why are there stars in the night sky?

[ky72x 13]

A: Someone stuck giant glow-in-the-dark stars up there a long time ago.

Q: How did the ball get stuck in that tree?

[Tommy_Vercetti3 3]

A: My car imploded on a leaf blowing contest and the ball sprouted wings and said yay tree..Thus landing in the tree.

Q: Why did the penguin fly over the computer while on fire?

[thundercrack83 0]

A: To catch the furnace.

Q: Where is the closet door?

[amal81 3]

may he had hot feet.

will there be an Anglo-Indian war?

[IDS2 3,346]

No but there will be an Alto-Saxo war.

Will there be a Soprano-American war?

[ky72x 13]

A: No, a Soprano-Tenor war is more realistic.

Q: Why is snow white?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Don't know. I've heard snow falls as a dark shade of grey down in the Southern Hemisphere, though.

Q: What parabolas did Jesus tell?

[Deever 23]

A: Ok let's see... He told the Parable of the Taco Stand, The Portero's Lost Mop, and The Story of Juan's Zapatos. That's all I can remember.

Q: What did Scooby Doo?

[homeandaway 1]

had a tiolet in your house

LOL

Anyway, what did the big tooth say to the small tooth?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Let's go to the Soviet Union!

Q: What is the quotient of 7+2i and (9-7i)log(e^[2/3])?

[ky72x 13]

A: Something like "3uigesjyplbkodf094" or "Burnt toast x 498,242 + uipl(*EWQW!@#vcM

Q: What would a 56 year old jar of mustard smell like?

[homeandaway 1]

A: A man who is named 'Colman', who is in the graveyard!.

Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney?

[Deever 23]

A: It said, "Hey, Go puff your smoke somewhere else, you're blocking the view!"

Q: Why is the sky blue and not red?

[daniel01 0]

A: I dunno

Q: Where's the Water?

[pickled_pig 7]

A: Go down to the basement of any Catholic Church; you'll most definately find some water there.

Q: When is a verb not a verb?