Have a Complaint Post it Here

[Palpatine001 57]

Seems Managerjosh pointed me to here: 

I thought I might kick off a complaint thread

Rules are, go to the site above, enter the detail on who or what company you want to complain about, press submit then post it here.

You must post the text from what the site generates, NOT YOUR OWN complaints...

For that go pester the staff...

Now then to kick things off I have 2 complaints

They can be found here

http://www.pakin.org/complaint?firstname=Simtropolis&pgraphs=10&gender=c

and here

http://www.pakin.org/complaint?title=King&firstname=&middlename=&lastname=Dirktator&suffix=%2C+M.D.&gender=m&shorttype=t&pgraphs=3

So then who do you have a complaint about?

[ManagerJosh 0]

Reading this letter won't be the easiest thing you've ever done but it may be one of the most rewarding. Let me cut to the chase: If you study Lord Palpatine's pigheaded hariolations long enough, you'll come to the inescapable conclusion that he keeps telling us that once he has approved of something it can't possibly be heartless. Are we also supposed to believe that it is his moral imperative to pour a few drops of wormwood into our general enthusiasm? I didn't think so. If I weren't so forgiving, I'd have to say that Palpatine sees no reason why he shouldn't flout all of society's rules. It is only through an enlightened, outraged citizenry that such moral turpitude, corruption, and degradation of the law can be brought to a halt. So, let me enlighten and outrage you by stating that the question that's on everyone's mind these days is, "Is Palpatine so stentorian as to think that this can go on forever?" While I don't know the answer to that particular question, I do know that I would be grateful if Palpatine would take a little time from his rigorous schedule to rouse people's indignation at Palpatine. Of course, pigs will grow wings and fly before that ever happens.

A recent fact-finder's report revealed that Palpatine vacillates between adversarial assertions and indelicate squibs. I could write pages on the subject, but the following should suffice. If natural selection indeed works by removing the weakest and most genetically unfit members of a species then Palpatine is clearly going to be the first to go. Because his power is built on lies, it therefore stands to reason that I try never to argue with him because it's clear he's not susceptible to reason. Palpatine's claim that the moon is made of green cheese is factually unsupported and politically motivated. Palpatine demands that we make a choice. Either we let him diminish society's inducements to good behavior or he'll create catchy, new terms for boring, old issues. This "choice" exemplifies what is commonly known as a "false dichotomy" or "the fallacy of the excluded middle" because it denies other alternatives, such as that the impact of Palpatine's apolaustic metanarratives is exactly that predicted by the Book of Revelation. Evil will preside over the land. Injustice will triumph over justice, chaos over order, futility over purpose, superstition over reason, and lies over truth. Only when humanity experiences this Hell on Earth will it fully appreciate that if you look soberly and carefully at the evidence all around you, you will obviously find that idle hands are the devil's tools. That's why Palpatine spends his leisure time devising ever more revolting ways to reinforce the concept of collective guilt that is the root of all prejudice.

Palpatine leads me to believe that he is crotchety. Stated differently, when it comes to his causeries, I, not being one of the many detestable scum of this world, insist that we have drifted along for too long in a state of blissful denial and outright complacency. It's time to encourage individuals to come out of their cocoons and flourish. The sooner we do that the better because he cannot tolerate the world as it is. He needs to live in a world of fantasies. To be more specific, some people don't seem to mind that Palpatine likes to treat anyone who doesn't agree with him to a torrent of vitriol and vilification. What a self-centered world we live in!

Palpatine can't seriously believe that he's merely trying to make this world a better place in which to live, can he? It's an interesting question and its examination will help us understand how Palpatine's mind works. Let me start by providing evidence that before Palpatine initiated a nonrepresentationalism flap to help promote his aberrant, overbearing fibs, people everywhere were expected to compile readers' remarks and suggestions and use them to raise several issues about his silly, pestilential teachings that are frequently m

[LarksTonguesInAspic 28]

someone on crack has too much time on their hands.

[Callbat 8]

I may be risking my life by telling you this, but EA's harangues either go uncontested or are openly supported by sullen despots. By way of introduction, let me just say that we have a dilemma of leviathan proportions on our hands: Should we give the needy a helping hand as opposed to an elbow in the face, or is it sufficient to name and shame EA's henchmen for their adversarial acts of gnosticism? That's the question that perplexes me the most because everybody is probably familiar with the cliche that EA would rather talk about making changes than actually make them. Well, there's a lot of truth in that cliche.

There is something patently malignant in the notion that EA can ignore rules, laws, and protocol without repercussion and if you don't believe me then you should set the record straight. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we lived in a world without contentious cadgers? As you can see, I admit I have a tendency to become a bit insensitive whenever I rebuke EA for trying to establish a world government complete with a world army, a world parliament, a world court, and numerous other agencies that deny the obvious. While I am desirous of mending this tiny personality flaw, EA has frequently been spotted making nicey-nice with the most cruel slanderers you'll ever see. Is this because it needs their help to display an irreconcilable hatred toward all nations? It's an interesting question and its examination will help us understand how EA's policies work. Let me start by providing evidence that I want you to know that this is an exceptionally convincing illustration of the power wielded by EA and of the destructive way in which it uses that power. Knowing, as they say, is half the battle. What remains is to expose every sniffish practice of every sniffish wheeler-dealer.

Over the years, I've enjoyed a number of genuinely pleasurable (and pleasurably genuine) conversations with a variety of people who understand that EA's theatrics are intended to get us all on board the jingoism train. In one such conversation, someone pointed out to me that if EA's newsgroup postings get any more foul, I expect they'll grow legs and attack me in my sleep. EA's secret passion is to make incorrect leaps of logic. For shame!

Regardless of whether we consider EA a lunatic, an evil aggressor, or whatever, it has gotten away with so much for so long that it's lost all sense of caution, all sense of limits. If you think about it, only an organization without any sense of limits could desire to create a new fundamentalism based not on religion but on an orthodoxy of libertinism. Some of EA's equivocations raise important questions about future social interactions and their relationship to civil liberties, by which I mean that I could go on for pages listing innumerable examples of EA's illiberal slurs and irritating disquisitions. I have already written enough, surely, to convince you that EA has repeatedly been spotted breaking down our communities. When questioned about that, it either denies any knowledge of it or offers unbelievable and ludicrous explanations that only a soporific New Age lummox could believe. If natural selection indeed works by removing the weakest and most genetically unfit members of a species then EA is clearly going to be the first to go.

Inasmuch as I disagree with EA's accusations and find its ad hominem attacks offensive, I am happy to meet EA's speech with more speech and, if necessary, continue this discussion until the truth shines. EA is inherently venom-spouting, uncivilized, and bad-tempered. Oh, and it also has a disagreeable mode of existence. If I were to compile a list of EA's forays into espionage, sabotage, and subversion, it would fill an entire page and perhaps even run over onto the following one. Such a list would surely make every sane person who has passed the age of six realize that EA's endeavors are based on a technique I'm sure you've heard of. It's call

[confused04 14]

Yay!

[Hamish 1,370]

^^ that complaint has to be a real one, Im sure of it.

[6underground 11]

Before My Penis starts ripping tendons and ligaments with its typical knee-jerk reaction to my letters, it should realize that what I really want from it is an apology. Before I start, however, I should state that to understand what its particularly corrupt form of prætorianism has encompassed as a movement and as a system of rule, we have to look at its historical context and development as a form of psychotic politics that first arose in early twentieth-century Europe in response to rapid social upheaval, the devastation of World War I, and the Bolshevik Revolution. If you can make any sense out My Penis's flighty roorbacks then you must have gotten higher marks in school than I did. Some people apparently believe that if we don't bother My Penis, My Penis won't bother us. The fallacy of that belief is that our desires and its are not merely different; they are opposed in mortal enmity. My Penis wants to generate an epidemic of corruption and social unrest. We, in contrast, want to alert people that all of its practices are based on the premise that this is the best of all possible worlds and that it is the best of all possible organizations. That's pretty transparent. What's not so transparent is the answer to the following question: Will its shots to the heart of all that is wholesome buy it its long-sought victory for scummy communism with its showy irreverence and glorification of all that is sinful? A clue might be that it does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when it says that there is an international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids, that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins.

There is no contradiction here; even though My Penis is off its rocker, you mustn't forget that My Penis's rank-and-file followers get a thrill out of protesting. They have no idea what causes they're fighting for or against. For them, going down to the local protest, carrying a sign, hanging out with My Penis, and meeting some other brazen, dictatorial kooks is merely a social event. They're not even aware that My Penis seizes every opportunity to damn this nation and this world to Hell. I cannot believe this colossal clownishness. Any sane person knows that if My Penis doesn't like it here, then perhaps it should go elsewhere.

Here's an extraordinary paradox: All of the childish jabberers who shouldn't be allowed to ridicule the accomplishments of generations of great men and women invariably want to. My Penis wants to lead a mad jihad against those who oppose it. But what if the tables were turned? How would My Penis like that? Humorless deadbeats would be far more bearable if they didn't inflict untold misery, suffering, and distress. I know you're wondering why I just wrote that. I'll explain shortly, but first, I should state that an armed revolt against My Penis is morally justified. However, I warrant that it is not yet strategically justified. What I had wanted for this letter was to write an analysis of My Penis's maneuvers. Not an exhortation or a shrill denunciation, but an analysis. I hope I have succeeded at that.

[ilikehotdogsalot 311]

While you're probably sick of hearing about 6underground, it is crucial that you read this letter. For complete details, I refer you to my forthcoming book on the subject. I shall here mention only a few random items that may be new or especially interesting to you. For instance, 6underground claims that coercion in the name of liberty is a valid use of state power. Well, I beg to differ. Even by 6underground's own account, once one begins thinking about free speech, about morally crippled power brokers who use ostracism and public opinion to prevent the airing of views contrary to their own vicious beliefs, one realizes that I am deliberately using colorful language in this letter. I am deliberately using provocative phrases that I hope will stick in the minds of my readers. I do ensure, however, that my words are always appropriate and accurate and clearly explain how the whole of 6underground's detestable, hateful worldview may perhaps be expressed in one simple word. That word is "Stalinism". Let me explain: 6underground is every bit as scabrous as what I call mindless, diabolic dweebs. An obvious parallel from a different context is that it would have us believe that this is the best of all possible worlds and that it is the best of all possible organizations. That, of course, is nonsense, total nonsense. But 6underground is surrounded by unbridled derelicts who parrot the same nonsense, which is why there is still hope for our society, real hope -- not the false sense of hope that comes from the mouths of what I call thrasonical muttonheads but the hope that makes you eager to serve on the side of Truth.

Do we not, as rational men and women, owe it to both our heritage and our posterity to strip the unjust power from those who seek power over others and over nature? I think we do. If you're like most people you just shrug your shoulders whenever you hear about 6underground's latest obstinate campaigns of malice and malignity. When your shoulders get tired of shrugging I hope you'll realize that 6underground's sympathizers get a thrill out of protesting. They have no idea what causes they're fighting for or against. For them, going down to the local protest, carrying a sign, hanging out with 6underground, and meeting some other nit-picky propagandists is merely a social event. They're not even aware that 6underground possesses no significant intellectual skills whatsoever and has no interest in erudition. Heck, it can't even spell or define "erudition", much less achieve it.

I am asking the readers of this letter to be aware that it would be a crying shame to let unrestrained good-for-nothings dress up 6underground's profit motive in the cloak of selfless altruism. There are several logical contradictions in its position on this matter. For example, the most stroppy adulterers you'll ever see seek vengeance on those unrepentant souls who persist in challenging 6underground's Ponzi schemes. That said, we mustn't lose sight of who the real enemy is: 6underground and its cruel adulators.

6underground's plan is to throw away our freedom, our honor, and our future. 6underground's yes-men are moving at a frightening pace toward the total implementation of that agenda, which includes giving rise to closed-minded spivs. 6underground does, occasionally, make a valid point. But when it says that all major world powers are controlled by a covert group of "insiders", that's where the facts end and the ludicrousness begins.

To get even the simplest message into the consciousness of splenetic crumbums it has to be repeated at least fifty times. Now, I don't want to insult your intelligence by telling you the following fifty times, but I, not being one of the many pestiferous malingerers of this world, want to see all of us working together to suggest the kind of politics and policies that are needed to restore good sense to this important debate. Yes, this is an idealistic approach to

[6underground 11]

ROFL!!!!

[Palpatine001 57]

Disclaimer: If ST gets one, then so can other sites     As said these are computer generated complaint letters designed to have a light laugh and yourself and others. Please do not take exception as you might need thicker skin to cope in the real world.

So then with out further ado the one I got for SC4D

---

I take exception to a few key aspects of SC4D's notions. Let's start with my claim that when SC4D's stupid utterances are translated into plain, words-mean-things English, it appears to be saying that it is the arbiter of all things. For me, this disreputable moonshine serves only to emphasize how SC4D has for a long time been arguing that its analects are not worth getting outraged about. Had it instead been arguing that due to circumstances that I have encountered in my research, I find that I must punish those who lie or connive at half-truths, I might cede it its point. As it stands, the leap of faith required to bridge the logical gap in SC4D's arguments is simply too terrifying for me to contemplate. What I do often contemplate, however, is how I am making a pretty serious accusation here. I am accusing it of planning to bombard us with an endless array of hate literature. And I don't want anyone to think that I am basing my accusation only on the fact that its stories about racism are particularly ridden with errors and distortions, even leaving aside the concept's initial implausibility.

On a lighter note, if you ever ask SC4D to do something, you can bet that your request will get lost in the shuffle, unaddressed, ignored, and rebuffed. There are some brusque wastrels who are goofy. There are also some who are inerudite. Which category does SC4D fall into? If the question overwhelms you, I suggest you check "both". This much is clear: SC4D says that superstition is no less credible than proven scientific principles. What balderdash! What impudence! What treachery!

Although I refuse to indulge SC4D's foibles, it is also true that like most organizations that have a lawless agenda to advocate, it wants to tell us how to live, what to say, what to think, what to know, and -- most importantly -- what not to know. This is a perverse paradox, the implications of which are too loathsome to dwell on short of saying that honest people will admit that SC4D's tactics are not normal. Concerned people are not afraid to expose SC4D's practices for what they really are. And sensible people know that instead of taking the easy path in life, the downward path, we must choose the upward path regardless of the pain, suffering, and sacrifice that this choice entails. Only then can we finally develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to pronounce the truth and renounce the lies. Yes, SC4D will try to stop us by forcing me to become increasingly frustrated, humiliated and angry, but it embraces fascism with open arms. The mere mention of that fact guarantees that this letter will never get published in any mass-circulation periodical that SC4D has any control over. But that's inconsequential because clericalism is not merely an attack on our moral fiber. It is also a politically motivated attack on knowledge. This is far from all I have to say on the topic, but it's certainly enough for now. Just remember one thing: This is explicitly or implicitly expressed or presupposed in most of the material I plan to present.

---

Oh and one on McDonalds

This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that anyone who takes McDonalds's materialistic apologues seriously has obviously not spent much time around ugly bribe-seekers. In the second, I make it clear that there is unquestionably no limit to McDonalds's impudence. And in the third and final section, I conclude that McDonalds's criticisms will gag free speech one of these days. T

[panthersimcity4 162]

Because many of the things I'm about to say regarding my Toilet have already been beaten into the ground, I will try to keep this letter short. I will start this discussion by arguing that my Toilet should think for himself. Then, I will present evidence that my Toilet's mind has limited horizons. It is confined to the immediate and simplistic, with the inevitable consequence that everything is made banal and basic and is then leveled down until it is deprived of all spiritual life. Maybe faster than you can say "ultrastandardization", he will revive the ruinous excess of a bygone era to bounce and blow amidst the ruinous excess of the present era. Snappish predictions aside, this would not be an impossible scenario if his unforgiving, gormless doctrines were to gain ascendancy in our society. It may be unfashionable to say so and it may surprise a few of you out there, but he craves more power. I say we should give my Toilet more power -- preferably, 10,000 volts of it.

It should be stressed that my Toilet avers that he acts in the public interest. As you can no doubt determine from comments like that, facts and my Toilet are like oil and water. However much he may deny it, if the only way to scuttle his juvenile attempts to strip people of their rights to free expression and individuality is for me to self-censor my critique of him, then so be it. It would honestly be worth it because I don't know what makes my Toilet think that the future of the entire world rests in his hands. Maybe he's been sipping cuckoo juice. The fact of the matter is that my Toilet's advocates remain largely silent when asked about the correlative connecting my Toilet to militarism. The rare times they do deign to comment they invariably skew the issue to prevent people from realizing that my Toilet wants to redefine humanity as alienated machines/beasts and then convince everyone that they were never human to begin with. Such intolerance is felt by all people, from every background. I hope I haven't bored you by writing an entire letter about my Toilet. Still, this letter was the best way to explain to you that my Toilet's view that all major world powers are controlled by a covert group of "insiders" is sheer make-believe.

[Duke87 1,070]

Because turning your enemy's tactics against them is aways fun to do:

---

Rather than engage in a point-by-point response to the textual interpretation of The Automatic Complaint Generator's utterances, I want to respond to the more general issue at hand. To address this in a pedantic manner, in the rest of this letter, factual information will be prefaced as such and my own opinions will be clearly stated as opinions. For instance, it is a fact that The Automatic Complaint Generator either is or elects to be ignorant of scientific principles and methods. It even intentionally misuses scientific terminology to keep a close eye on those who look like they might think an unapproved thought. I don't care what others say about The Automatic Complaint Generator. It's still unrestrained, ethically bankrupt, and it intends to publish blatantly shabby rhetoric as "education" for children to learn in school.

Sure, some of The Automatic Complaint Generator's philippics are valid but that's not the point. This is a suitable place in the letter to explain how the online disinhibition effect perfectly explains why The Automatic Complaint Generator's so keen to tell everyone that clever one-liners are a valid substitute for actual thinking. Unfortunately, I'll have to skip that rather interesting discussion because I have bigger fish to fry. In particular, I need to tell you that The Automatic Complaint Generator wants you to believe that we should derive moral guidance from its glitzy, multi-culti, hip-hop, consumption-oriented smear tactics. You should be wary of such claims. Be aware! Be skeptical! Think! Do not be diverted, deceived, or mesmerized by The Automatic Complaint Generator's flighty grievances.

How dare The Automatic Complaint Generator criticize my values when its are so obviously dictatorial? The Automatic Complaint Generator whines about wrongheaded, worthless so-called experts, yet it enthusiastically supports demented chiselers of one sort or another. If you need proof that The Automatic Complaint Generator favors conquest not only by violence but also by the peaceful and delicate methods of cheating, lying, and pimping, then just take a look at The Automatic Complaint Generator.

When surveyed, only two percent of The Automatic Complaint Generator's lieutenants agreed with the statement, "A 'respected' member of The Automatic Complaint Generator's coalition of beastly, shrewish desperadoes and discourteous, overbearing dorks recently said (to closely paraphrase), 'We should be grateful for the precious freedom to be robbed and kicked in the face by such a noble creature as The Automatic Complaint Generator'." This is a frightening statistic to those who rely on, or simply support, social tolerance and open-mindedness. In a rather infamous speech, The Automatic Complaint Generator exclaimed that two wrongs make a right. (I edited out the rest of what it said because, well, it didn't really say anything.) As for the lies and exaggerations, The Automatic Complaint Generator's goal is to require schoolchildren to be taught that it can override nature. This is abject gnosticism!

The Automatic Complaint Generator's dissertations have served as a powerful weapon with which irritable lunkheads can put the foxes in charge of guarding the henhouse. I put that observation into this letter just to let you see that you may be wondering why despicable Luddites latch onto The Automatic Complaint Generator's conjectures. It's because people of that nature need to have rhetoric and dogma to recite during times of stress in order to cope. That's also why every time The Automatic Complaint Generator tells its subordinates that it holds a universal license that allows it to abet a resurgence of footling revisionism, their eyes roll into the backs of their heads as they become mindless receptacles of unsubstantiated information, which they accept without question. In closing, I cons