The Simtropolis Rap Battle

[Kryptowhite 9]

Bout time we had an official Simtropolis rap battle.

The rules are simple.

One brave soul starts out by dropping a few lines and then you can respond with a little verse of your own. Please bold any actual raps you are posting so that we can tell comments and raps apart. The winner is declared when they have successfully caused everybody else to give up because their lyrics were so good.

For those of you who don't know, a rap battle is basically when two or more people rap back and forth, taking jabs at eachother, responding to the others jabs, and throwing in a ton of ego-inflation. For those of you with your head literally stuck in sand, rap is basically like poetry only less cultural haha.

Now, as we all know, rap can get pretty vulgar and offensive, but obviously, keep out all the dirty language and sexual material...think about it, it takes a true genius to be able to write a good rap without swears!

We are also going to assume that all the insults are going to be in a playful facetious manner, in the spirit of rap battles, and that none of it is actually sincere or should be interpreted as serious. So for example, if I say to Glenni "Hows the weather in Norway, you wouldn't know, your too busy batting trash to check for snow" [give me a break, i had to come up with Something...] we can all assume that I am just joking and I don't actually believe glenni's bats are trash? Comprende? 

Somebody get this going...its always a good idea to start by going after MC Kryptowhite

[Easy Bakes 253]

There was a young man from Nantucket

[Duke87 1,070]

Originally posted by: Kryptowhite

Now, as we all know, rap can get pretty vulgar and offensive, but obviously, keep out all the dirty language and sexual material...think about it, it takes a true genius to be able to write a good rap without swears!quote>

PG-13 rap? Blasphemy!

Seriously, though. Rap without profanity is like soda without bubbles - the vital buzz is missing, and it's flat and unpleasant to consume.

[astronelson 339]

I'll have a go, but I generally keep my meter in check too much for effective rapping...

To rap, to live, requires tact.

PG-13? I'll take that act.

Duke87, you haven't tried

Step up, release the rhyme inside.

But while this thread isn't that lame

It seems to be more a forum game.

It's not my call though, to make that choice

we need a mod, but 'til then, your voice.

[Kryptowhite 9]

Originally posted by: Duke87

Yo astro, brotha

Ya dunno how ta rhyme!

Ya English is too proppa

Ya lyrics a crime!

Ya gotta get wit da program

Ya gotta talk mo' like dis

Then maybe y'all hit sumthin'

insteada just miss!

Okay, silliness aside, there's a valid point to be made here: Rap and proper English don't mix.

quote>

Yo MC Duke,

your beats are fly,

your lyrics truer,

but i can't lie,

I can see right through ya,

Rap aint a game about hit or miss,

taking shots, and throwing fists,

its all about the heart, the blood sweat and tears,

of which you'll never have even if you spit for years,

so please sit down, y'all aint slim shady,

maybe i'll yet you be number two like Yao let McGrady,

What.

[Kryptowhite 9]

umm..somehow my response to duke got posted so that it is above the previous two posts. You'll have to look at the dates of the posts i guess. thats weird

[A Nonny Moose 8,261]

The choice of the voice makes

The verse that is worse fakes

A poet who don't know it

When its time not to blow it

The wit is a whim

But in this I can't swim.

[Duke87 1,070]

Yo astro, brotha

Ya dunno how ta rhyme!

Ya English is too proppa

Ya lyrics a crime!

Ya gotta get wit da program

Ya gotta talk mo' like dis

Then maybe y'all hit sumthin'

insteada just miss!

Okay, silliness aside, there's a valid point to be made here: Rap and proper English don't mix.

[Simcity player 13]

Check out my Chevy its really heavy

Check out my Hummer, its a true bummer

Check out my Mercedes, bringing up the ladies

Check out my Lexus, Driven from Texas

Check out my Volkswagon, beats your horsewagon

Check out my Cadillac, its really all that

Check out my Mustang, has a huge mustard stain

Check out my Ferrari, the engine goes roari

Check out my Toyota, Driven by Yoda

Check out my Ford, if you Can afford

Check out my BMW, its not for you

beat that

[A Nonny Moose 8,261]

Originally posted by: Duke87

Okay, silliness aside, there's a valid point to be made here: Rap and proper English don't mix.

quote>

And so, you see, rap encourages illiteracy, profanity, and downright lewdness.  Down with rap!

[Kryptowhite 9]

Originally posted by: Simcity player

Check out my Chevy its really heavy

Check out my Hummer, its a true bummer

Check out my Mercedes, bringing up the ladies

Check out my Lexus, Driven from Texas

Check out my Volkswagon, beats your horsewagon

Check out my Cadillac, its really all that

Check out my Mustang, has a huge mustard stain

Check out my Ferrari, the engine goes roari

Check out my Toyota, Driven by Yoda

Check out my Ford, if you Can afford

Check out my BMW, its not for you

beat that

quote>

Man your beats are stale,

And I aint feelin your rhymes,

if you wanna ramble bout cars,

dont do it on my time,

check it,

in the hood where i'm from,

don't matter what drive,

no matter how you roll,

we all gonna die,

from the spray of the bullets,

flying back and forth,

we runnin from the cops like the slaves to the north,

so hide behind your car mister simcity player,

i'm old school, hard and true, hater.

2ez.

[note several rap techniques such as rapping about a "hood" that you never actually grew up in, talking about getting shot at, and running from the cops]

[Raysfan16 5]

Jamal, you so white

Yo' rap aint tight

But I gots no skill so I won't pretend

So this little rap is comin' to an end

[DazzaDazza 29]

What the sizzle, with the fizzle

yah I'm the king of the drizzle

With ya all in the simtrop rap ,

Hay, why are you guys so crap

I'm the king, yah I'm the king so beat that, You hacks

Yah hacks, because you wax. Your chest and you where a vest

Because you are a pest

Like a fly, you eat carp just like you talk,

And when you rap.

[Jillybean86 38]

Fresh like a box of Krispy Kreme

I am much badder than I would seem

My beats wins awards with a llama

At least they did when I spit to yo mama

While you throw rhymes that are stale

Mine are fatter than a whale

Now I gotta go away for awhile

That's how I do it Big Jilly Style....

[Cockatoo 2,256]

Mr bulldog over here

thinks he is ta big king

but you shouda seen him cry

when his poor team didn't win!

He rhyme like a fool

with his pest and vest

makes about as much sense

as his mommas house arrest!

Krypto this your stage

so I gonna tell it straight

raps all about the shots, the fists

you gonna learn that at any rate.

So I challenge you bulldog

or anyone else here

come at me swinging

from you clowns, I got nothing to fear.

Btw Krypto, really nice idea for a thread.

[Kryptowhite 9]

Well to start, I'd like to give a shout out...

yo cockatoo

thanks for givin credit where credit is do,

and to Jacobs, Jill

i like how you said spit game

we say that in Boston, i'm glad Minny does the same

but to some of the many haters out there

you got much to fear,

i'll make the hood look good

when i beat you like im Ellen Woods,

9-iron in hand, story in the other,

can't be caught i'm like Undercover Brother

never even seen that movie,

i'll reference it anyway,

try and call me out on it,

i'll take you  anyday

I'm the king kong of the jungle, the guy who gets the fumble

Don't act like i don't know about throwin them fists,

i swing em blindly,

make you look worse than The Academy Is,

I'm like the Grey Ghosts,

I can't be seen,

 in the background caught up with running the scene,

I could go on for days

but whats the point?

I'm number one

in any joint.

[DazzaDazza 29]

 

. 

Hear we have a grate big pest, yah you, the Cockatoo with beady eyes
I see you over there eating fruits off my trees like a pest,
But if I was you, I would be so Cocky, I would fly away pretty fast,
I will put you back where you belong in the cage, in the dark
Where you sit on your perch, wishing that you never left.

Poly wants a cracker! 
Mr. Krypto up above the only cred you should be givein is the dog form the west
Because once I drop my fat bets, you won't see white, you will only see red
Now for the last Jill Jacobs, if I was you I quit wile you are a head, because I think you got nothing left

  

[Kryptowhite 9]

Grumpy Pitbull, this aint free verse,

whats wrong? Can't rap when you can't curse?

Your lyrics need to rhyme,those read like a book,

your jabs are weak wheres your left hook? 

I'll tell you how I learned to rhyme,

its a dandy little tale,

maybe after you hear it,

your raps won't be so stale.

check it.

Back on the west side of harlem

life was such a pain,

couldn't go to the store,

widdout gettin popped in the brain,

music was our savior,

we rapped to pass time,

we learned to rap battle,

and we learned to rhyme,

i suggest you do the same,

cause your facing a king,

a king who knows, the weather lies when they say no snow,

cause its 9:30 am and the white stuffs still fallin,

it gives me hope, to one day get outta harlem.

Is it a shot at bulldog, or my lifes story about a rough upbringing in harlem? Nobody knows.

Its always smart to place yourself in a rough neighborhood it gives your raps more credibility.

[Jillybean86 38]

That's all you fools have got to say?

Here I get shot at like every day

There's no need to treat me like a lady, yo

My words be so hard they be breakin your radio

To me your raps sound like nasty vomit

If I were you, I'd probably get on it

For next time...so you can do better

So your rhymes aren't as ugly as a Christmas sweater

And you can't even talk about y'all's hoods

I'd bust up all your homies like Elin on Tiger Woods

Bullets would be flyin like a blizzard

Reloading so fast, you'd swear I was a wizard

Bring it on, boys, my name is MC Jill

And this rap battle just got real

damn, I should've read those better.  Krypto beat me to the Tiger Woods thing...even though mine was better

[DazzaDazza 29]

You wont to talk about hoods, I came from the Footscray, and they are some bad streets,

Beatings, stabbings every week,

And that's only from the grammar that lives down the street.

Around hear we call it the scray, they are some bad ass streets, so you better lay low.

Unless you won't to bring it on, then come down to the Whitten oval if you want to feel the heat,

But you wont, you won't even come near the joint,

You will take one look at us run,

You'll get back on the plane, and back to your week hood,

You'll tell your friends and every one you meet in the streets, "don't go to the scray man, unless you won't to feel the heat.

The next day you'll be waking around, and you'll se hotdog van across the street, you'll go over and order one because your week.

The casher will say to you "do you wont some chill with that"

And you'll say "yah I can handle the heat"

You'll take one bite and think to your self,

MAN! That is some serious heat, you'll start crying and thinking to your self, " that dog packs a punch, must be a dog from the scray.

Now I'm fished with you, Jilly your next to fell the heat!!!

[Jillybean86 38]

Damn, Mr D, who taught you how to rap?

You should get your money back

Why don't you use the word "heat" a couple more times?

Let me help you:  you need all new rhymes.

Get a new hood

Make your rhymes good

Act like a real G should

Don't eat pansy food

If you see me run as fast as you could

Cuz we're comin in like the flood.

In your raps you gotta say somethin profound

Or I'll throw you up on the dead body mound

Before my homies slaughter yours like cattle,

You'd better get out of this rap battle

I gots to go cuz my room is pretty chilly

Just know that you got served by Jilly

That's how a rap battle goes, folks.  Word.

[Vahr 341]

You tellin me you can't rhyme on a dime?

But what if you took your time?

Or is it too hard to do while you dine?

But if you really got brain,

and did so without disdain.

You could unleash the flow and deal your blow.

So that is why I gather here

To insult what makes us dear.

Jill, yo, you don't always need to follow the guide,

for if you do, you may get in a glide.

And if you do,

oh if you do,

You may find yourself

Landing upon the shelf.

Dunno how well that went... lol.

[PhilsCafe 8]

y'all have to try harder

'cause I'm a lot smarter

your rhymes don't make sense

and you used the wrong tense

Now it's my turn

and you're all gonna burn

cause Philly C is in da house

and he ain't no Mickey Mouse...

Peace out.

[Cockatoo 2,256]

Mr Bulldog over here

thinks I'm too scared to shoot

but I'd watch out dog, cus if you don't

i'll take more than just your fruit!

You a tiny little puppy boy

you know nothing of hood crime

you just wear your had backward, talk real tough

that is, if mummy lets you out past bed time!

WOOF!

I know you'll never see the real hood

your rhymes are too low key

In any contest, you may contest

you'll always be number 3!

So you just walk away dog

wif your tail hangin low

you'll never beat me at this game

I just stole your show!

Somethin strange is tellin me

that Krypto's left the stage

he's lost his final battle

he's turned the final page.

He won't be rappn anymore

he's put away for good

but the rap battle must go on

you know, deep down, it should.

[Muck308 55]

Readin' this forum's,

Like watchin' squirrels forage.

Save your breath for your porridge,

And leave tha flow to Muck.

Ya'll couldn't tow a truck,

With muscle like that.

S'far as I can see,

Your hussle's fallin' flat.

You'd best watch an' learn,

Fore I make your crotch burn.

Cause steppin' off tha berm,

Gets you smacked by a bus.

Why ya'll gotta fuss?

This art form is a must.

But readin' wack ryhmes,

Just makes my eyes crust.

At least ya'll are tryin',

But take a course or two.

Class starts at nine,

And tha teacher's yours true.

[DazzaDazza 29]

Hay jilly I said I was comen after you

You're out of your depth, out of your mind

Little miss princesses , little Miss your mine.

You should go back to your babies, and your skipping ropes too.

Hay, I hear that babies now a brand new little pink hat.

So you should just go off and play

And leave the rhymes to someone that can rap.

You didn't listen to what I had to say,

You may have your looks and you may have your pride,

but that all you got left in this rap rhyme,

as I side before you ant got nothing left.

Nothing but your memories left inside of your head

To the blue lightning that decided to post, this is rap,

Not a silly joke, your rap ant nothing just like Cockatoos,

but what do you expect from a bird that just eats and craps

Muck308, I will 86s your ass so just you wait,

You call your self the teacher,

but I go some news fore you, I'm in charge hear

and I will be teachn you.

[Jillybean86 38]

Finally, someone came after me solid

Too bad it sucked, and now I'm appalled

Homie, I was 6 when I gave up bubble gum

And instead I had to learn to shoot a handgun

Some tough actin G beat up my best girl

I had to track him down and take him out this world

And now I'll do the same for you if you keep this up

If you stick around, good luck

I'll show now mercy, that's what I do

Time for bulldog to get some sort of clue

It's not my fault that my flow went over your head

You got to pay attention to what is being said

You're makin this way too easy

Try a little harder, like Jim for Pam Beasley

Your beats is slop, and your rhymes are old

now I'm gonna go, cuz my state is cold

Peace

~MC Jilly J

[PhilsCafe 8]

This thread is so pathetic

those raps aren't even close to being extatic

Muck,

I'mma let you finish, but your rhymes suck

there's no sign of a flow

your beats sound like the ones of Average Joe

Dazza ignored the Philly C

yes, you stand no chance against me

that's why you better get rich

or die trying, b... arry bonds

'Cause without drugs you won't succeed

Philly C knows all the beats

Oh and Chilly J,

well what can I say

you're nothing more than a Minnie Mouse

you might be in Minnesota, but not in tha house

you're such a lightweight I do hear

you get drunk from a beer...

[Vahr 341]

Oh you say I can't rap?

But heck, the rules are crap.

It can make sense,

but if you're too dense

You may as well just get a fence.

Of course I may say this

The angle is divis.

I can write like a hood

or I can poetry real good.

Ohil, that twas good.

Throwing in some interrupt.

But oh, what do I see here?

Its Chrissy, blank post there.

And I ain't need no drugs

They turn you inta bugs.

And getting drunk?

I don't go that low you trunk.

That was interesting... I guess that's what happens when you just type.

[Muck308 55]

If anyone's in charge of this,

It's me and don't forgit it.

Dazza wants a part of this,

But I just can't permit it.

Says he's comin' out for Muck,

But I would not predict it.

If anything he'll pay a buck,

To listen to me spit it.

He an Philly C'll be

just fine sittin' n listnen.

Cause when I find some enemies

I make 'em seek contrition.

Watch me while I glisten kids,

Cause ya'll ain't even fittin' in.

Been rappin' since my christenin'

And I ain't NEVER finishin'.