Hey guys. Umm...something bad happened to me today so I was hoping i can find some advice here since simtropolis is such a nice place to hang out. Well here it goes:
I've gotten to know this guy from the US who was also gay and 16 as well. He was actually the first gay friend I've ever had in my entire life. Anyway, he was really a great guy. Nice, sweet, polite, smart, intelligent and handsome as well. Overtime, our friendship grew closer and closer and soon we became best friends within a month of knowing each other. We would just talk for like hours on end and I never got bored of talking to him on MSN. There was really so many interests that we had in common! It's really uncanny but I really like him a lot! I would practically get up early in the morning just to talk to him! I got to know a lot about him and then I had a huge crush on him but i didn't dare to tell him.
Then on Monday, he said he liked me a lot and asked me to his BF. I couldn't believe it when he told me that. It was a dream come true for me. I've always wanted a boyfriend who was smart, handsome and had a great personality so I was overjoyed! The only problem is that we're still 16 and we were thousands of miles apart from each other. Still, we wanted to be with each other so we then decided to have a long distance relationship. I was so happy for the past few days. I didn't feel sad at all which was usual for me. He always put a smile on my face and I really enjoy spending time with him. He was just perfect and the my first love. I loved him a lot and couldn't stop thinking about him. We even planned everything out! Once I finish secondary school and serve 2 years of compulary military training, I would move to some major US city (Boston, NYC, Heartford) and live with him. From there, I might go study in a local university. Lol we even went around sites and looked at houses and even plan to adopt children! But the thing is, all of these stuffs is 6 YEARS AWAY from reality! It looked so daunting and we hoped our relationship will last till we finally get to meet at last. I was keeping my hopes up a lot by then.
Then today, I got up early in the morning and talked him. Then he said, Reuben, I need to talk you something and I knew something bad was going to happen. And the thing I feared the most happened. Just 5 days into the relationship, my BF told me that he does not know if our relation will work out because I was so far away from him and we could not be in physical contact with him. He said that its not that he does not like me or anything, its the distance that was disturbing him. The only we kept in contact was through MSN. I knew the relationship was too good to be true in the first and I knew there was catch and it turned out to be the distance. He then told me that maybe we should just remain as friends for now and maybe we'll be able to get back together once we get older. I was devastated when he told me that. I was very emotionally attacted to him and I really really loved him. He was such a awesome and cool guy. I was really in love with him (surprisingly, I didnt have any sexual fantasies about him). He asked me if I was upset and of course I said I was not. I didn't want to upset him. I also said that I was feeling the pinch too but as long as I can get to talk to him, I'm happy and satisfied and can wait 6 years for him. I was so sad when we said that we should just remain as best friends for now. I then cried to myself a lot and well, I'm still feeling very sad and depressed now. The love of my life is now gone. I just love him much and I couldn't bear to break up with him.
So now, I'm asking what should I do guys? I really want to get back to him and I'm thinking of trying to mend the relationship but I can't if he does not want to. I just feel so sad now. I don't want him to think that I'm desperate or anything. I just want to know if there is still a chance we can get back together. I feel so helpless and idiotic now. I just want to be with him. 6 years is so far away and I dont even know if I can even sustain a close frienship till then. I mean the chance of me and hom getting back together 6 years down the road looks really unrealistic but I know there's a chance. So what should I do guys? I'm really at my wits ends now. I don't what to do and I really want to talk to the guy I like but imagine the awkwardness and all that. I can't help but feel giulty for everything. I couldnt stop thinking of him in school and I didnt talk much today. So yeah I would really appreciate it if I could get some advice. Thanks.